Sweet & Salty

Carrie KittingerMarriage, Parenting, Practical Living

I was doubly blessed last week as I honored two amazing men. I celebrated my dad a few days early for Father’s Day and returned home in time to celebrate my husband as well. Danny and I were thrilled to have both of our kids home.

We planned a whole weekend of family fun. My husband grew up water skiing so we decided to spend Saturday afternoon at a lake less than an hour from our home. We checked the weather forecast and with only a 15% chance of rain we rented a boat and set out. As soon as we left the dock we noticed a dark cloud looming overhead. We prayed for that 85% chance of no rain to kick in and the rain cloud to blow over without a storm. The loud booms of thunder should have been enough to question our positivity but we continued out. Within ten minutes on the lake we got into such heavy rain that it felt more like hail than raindrops.

Then the lightening started to flash. By the time we made the decision to head back to the marina, we all looked like we’d gone into the lake head first.

To top the evening off, we settled into dinner at the marina restaurant only to have a few more problems arise. All the other boaters had taken shelter at the restaurant as well, making it a long wait for our food to arrive. AND a disagreement erupted towards the end of the meal.

Another dark cloud loomed overhead.

One may experience sorrow during the night, but joy arrives in the morning.
Psalm 30:5b (NET)

The Lord’s loyal kindness never ceases: His compassions never end. They are fresh every morning; Your faithfulness is abundant!
Laminations 3:22-23

Even when we invite negativity and offense, the Lord sends joy and compassion knocking on our door in the morning. We can invite them in or we can lock the door and stay in our funk.

The next day – Father’s Day – ended up being a game changer. New attitudes, sweet time at church, steaks grilled with extended family, memories shared around the table and an evening at a fun, new family golf venue. (I won’t go into detail about our golf “lane” not working. After several attempts from the manager to fix the problem we were moved to a different spot. Maybe it was because one of us – who will go unnamed – had no business golfing.)

Oh, we also received a rain check to cash in at the marina later this summer. We’ll be sure to pick a day full of sun in the skies and in our attitudes!

Everyday life is a mixture of sweet and salty.

Here are a few things to keep in mind as you navigate through the sweet and salty times of family life:

  • Know when to call it a day and start afresh in the morning.

Not every day can be tied up like a box with a pretty bow on it. Sometimes we must choose to shake off the offense, forgive, keep our ramblings to ourselves, and get a good night’s rest. Did I mention sleep? “Slangry” (sleep deprived anger) is real. So is “hangry” (hunger inspired anger). Eat a healthy snack and get some sleep!

  • Nobody, even the cutest Instagram or Facebook family, has it all together all of the time.IMG_2614

I don’t know about you but when my family is having a rough day what flashes through my mind are pictures of happy, beautiful families on social media. Imagine if we all started sharing the good, the bad and the ugly. Maybe we wouldn’t have as many “friends” or likes but we’d be honest with the whole story. Here’s a picture of our day. What you don’t see is all that I unveiled to you above.

 

  • Where there are oxen in the stall there will be poop!

Without oxen a stable stays clean, but you need a strong ox for a large harvest.
Proverbs 14:4 (NLT)

Yes, this is really in the Bible! We can have “perfect” homes, marriages, children, etc. Or, we can really live life, let others in, and see a harvest. Messes happen. My son is working an extra job this summer at a horse barn. Part of his job is cleaning up the poop and laying fresh shavings. Guess what? There is poop each time he attends to the stalls regardless of how meticulously he cleaned them the day before. We are human. We make messes. Jesus is great at cleaning up our messes when we allow Him in. Enter into His fresh provision of mercy each day. Extend His mercy to others as well.  What about the poop? Well, it makes great fertilizer! Just ask my son. Part of his job is to pile the poop into a manure spreader attached to a tractor and drive around the land spreading it.

  • Don’t underestimate the power of repentance and forgiveness.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. If you live in close quarters with anyone get used to saying, “I’m sorry. Will you please forgive me? Can we start over?” When on the receiving end of this get used to saying, “I forgive you. Let’s start afresh.” Because we all want to be forgiven we must practice forgiving as well. Repentance and forgiveness are at the core of the gospel message. Our world needs to see this lived out!

  • Grow in the salty times and enjoy the sweet ones.

Salt can stir up thirst within us. When bad attitudes and meanness arise, we are made aware of areas that need help. These are the moments that should prod us to ask the Lord to help us and bring transformation. These are the moments that should drive us to look for healthy ways to deal with offense, disappointment, anger or rejection.  Why should we allow one comment to ruin an entire day?  Let’s shift our focus and pay more attention to the sweet moments throughout the day. Time will only tell, but maybe we’ll laugh at some of the salty times later.

If you are married – stay in the game! If you have children – train them up! If you are human – deal with the poop. Ask for forgiveness or forgive – then move beyond offense! And pay attention to the weather reports, especially those of your heart.

Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.

Proverbs 4:23 (NIV)